Friday, September 14, 2012

Grave Stone

Just ordered Seth's gravestone. The cemetery has regulations for stones in the infant section of the cemetery. It's a tiny 8x16 and online, the stone only was $189.  Setting the stone will be around another $200, plus another $150 for the vase to be set into the cement border (required by the cemetery, the cement is, not the vase, but I want the vase), plus the city charges $100 when you set the stone.  Just under $650 for the whole thing compared to some local companies that charge more than that just for the stone itself!  Really, we only saved about $200 going the online route, but anyway...

As you know, Ben and I had two Star Trek names picked out to use for the baby, once we found out the gender, until settling on a real name at birth. As we went in that day for the ultrasound at 19 weeks, we were going to find out if we were going to be calling our baby Worf (boy) or Sito Jaxa (girl) for the next 20 weeks until s/he was born. Instead, we found out our baby had died. The u/s tech was sure it was a girl, but at birth we found out our little one was a boy. We had wanted to put the Star Trek emblem on the stone, but despite several emails and being guided and directed to different people in different departments, I
never heard back from the final person. So I ordered the stone today without the emblem. I'm kinda sad about that as it was going to be our little happy moment when visiting his grave. Instead, we got a teddy bear graphic, foot prints hopefully sized to his feet (2cm heel to toe, not HIS footprints, but the right SIZE anyway), and a heart corner-piece with a stemmed rose.

I wish we could have gotten that emblem on the stone.  But we didn't want to wait a long time before getting the stone set.  I want his grave marked properly.  Right now, I have pictures of who is buried around him so I don't lose his unmarked spot.  :( 

What a bittersweet day.  I'm happy to have it ordered, but it really sucks having to buy your son's grave marker.
 
Here is a preview of the stone:
 
 

6 comments:

The Shavers said...

Your right Ginger, it's not easy ordering the headstone. I remember that feeling all too well! You picked out a beautiful one though!! What a great marker for Seth's gravesite! Love ya!

Kim said...

It looks perfect. It is so tough because you just want it to be perfect. I didn't decide what I wanted for Reese and Scotlyn for 7 months. You will have many opportunities to bring the Star Trek theme to life as a part of remembrance for Seth.

Leslie said...

What a beautiful headstone. I am so sorry you were not able to get the Star Trek emblem on the headstone but hope that you can find another way to incorporate into your memories of Seth! (((Hugs)))

Anonymous said...

Above my baby my family has the most beautiful flowers going all the way down the hill of their yard. Although s/he does not have a stone, there is a stump from the tree that use to shade their driveway that sometimes, when no one is there, I sit and pray. It is hard for me still, especially since no one really knows. You are so strong to be so open. It truly has helped me to read your posts. Thank you for sharing.

Mel said...

What a bittersweet experience this has been, my friend. I am so glad you were able to get such a beautiful headstone for little Seth.

Heather O said...

It was just a few weeks ago that we were ordering our baby daughter's headstone. Such a difficult thing to do, and you want it to be just right... but, like you, we had trouble finding a company who would do exactly what we wanted.

In the end, I am absolutely satisfied with how our Clara's stone came out, and I hope you will be just as pleased with Seth's marker.


Hugs to you, mama.